Mr. Magorium's Wonder Emporium DVD Review

"The only stroke I've ever had is one of genius!" the titular character played by Dustin Hoffman says. Remember on "Seinfeld" when one of Elaine's boyfriends remarked that Dustin Hoffman was in "Star Wars?" Well I never found that to be too strange. I could totally see it! This film is proof that I'll buy Dustin Hoffman in just about anything. Even crap. Hell, even the stuff he's not technically good or qualified to be in such as the pair of Italians he played in "Perfume" and "Finding Neverland." And don't get me started on the quirky brilliance that is "The Messenger." Like William Shatner getting a pass for being "William Shatner" in a movie, Hoffman is in a league unto his own and, as such, should be held to a different set of aesthetic rules and quality. He alone can make me like a film and he alone made me survive the experience of "Mr. Magorium's Wonder Emporium."

"This is one of my favorite stories of all time" a child's voice opens the film with. Um, to each their own I guess. Quite the opposite is true as I've heard some really bad things about "Magorium"; like, worst-film-ever-made bad. "Magorium" is not that. It is instead is the kind of film you get when you crossbreed Pee-Wee Herman with Harry Potter. Its crowning achievement is that, within this genre, it's far better than the Robin Williams movie "Toys." But, hell, the last time my pug bit me was better than that film so it isn't saying much. What IS saying much is that the film works better than another curious toy film, Burton's tonally disastrous "Charlie and the Chocolate Factory." The plot involves a seemingly ageless, lispy-loopy toymaker named, you got it, Mr Magorium. "I've been inventing toyssss ssssince the mid ssssseventeen ssssssseventies" he tells the store's bean counter. And Magorium runs a --ohmygod!-- toy emporium. The only thing the title seems to get wrong is the "Wonder" part. As toys come to life in a tandem of sub-Miyazaki, sub-"Toy Story" busyness, it's more ghastly fascination than wonder; though "Mr. Magorium's Ghastly Fantorium" doesn’t roll off the tongue quite as well.

Donning a creepy yet somehow hot little boy’s haircut, Natalie Portman of all people co-stars as Marorium's musical apprentice who is being suited by the spiky haired Santa Clause figure to take over his magical world. In comes the deadpan Jason Bateman as the tax accountant sent in to appraise the century-old business that Magorium is set to leave all of a sudden. This, in turn, causes the toy store, a childish character of its own, to get pissed off and "tantrum" ("the laws of gravity have started to apply!" Magorium is shocked to learn of his magical store) and, that, I’m afraid is where I got to bow out of of explaining because you've got to see the rest for yourself if this at all sounds interesting. Ever the talented maestro, Magorium's trusty pal Portman spends the film attempting to "prove to her self that she was something more than she believed." Just think about that logic for a second; how can one prove to oneself something they believe the opposite of? That kind of initially impressive, retrospectively dumb-ass voice-over dialogue comes form the popular new writer director of whom I'm not a fan of but is growing on me with this Strange gesture of a film.

Written and directed by Hoffman's "Stranger Than Fiction" buddy Zach Helm (appropriately named), this film gets points for trying. But why is it that every Zach Helm films I see involves tax men coming in to bring order to a disorderly store? Luckily, the tone here is a lot less smug and strident than "Fiction." In that film Helm got caught up in its own invention while in this one he gets caught up in actual inventions. Helm is not out to reinvent the narrative form (which he failed at the last time out), he just wants to make a different kids film. And that he has. Even if I can't recommend the film for myself, it's the kind of story that wins you over despite its not-quite-kids/not-quite-adult narrative.

The DVD

* Format: AC-3, Color, Dolby, Dubbed, DVD-Video, Subtitled, Widescreen, NTSC * Language: English * Subtitles: English, French, Spanish * Region: Region 1

Extras Woah, featurettes ahoy! There are no less than mini-docs that take us through "Supposedly the Mind of Zach Helm." All, like the film, are fluff pieces in which director/hipster Zach Helm gets off on his genus. One is even about "Fun on the Set" which has no point other than to show how much fun it is to be around toys. Ummmm: yay???