MANswers DVD Review

The SPIKETV show MANswers would easily be the most offensive, sexist, and chauvinist thing I’ve ever seen if it wasn’t in close competition with everything else on SPIKETV. This DVD shows a series of clips from season one, as it counts down the top 25 MANswers, plus several “bonus” MANswers. The questions include: What’s the best human organ to eat? What does the shape of her boob tell you about her personality? What’s the most dangerous wild animal in America? How can you make your girlfriend less bitchy? Is the death touch for real? What kind of girls are best in bed? How many floors can you fall in an elevator and still survive? Can you beat a breathalyzer? How can you defend yourself in a bar fight? How tough are implants? How can a guy get high legally? How can you turn your pickup truck into a hot tub? How many people have been killed by vending machines? So what the hell is a crushing video? How can you take a bullet out yourself? How teeny can a bikini get before it’s legally considered nudity? How can you get drunk faster? How big do boobs have to be to crush a beer can? How have guys gotten a happy ending at high-class massage parlors? Do big boobs float? Can you take the dump of death? How do you take a stripper home? Which animal is most like having sex with a woman? Is she a hooker or is she a cop? Who has the biggest boobs in the world? Like everything else on SPIKETV (at least it’s original programming), the whole perspective at play here is that women are sex objects, simply boobs with faces, that have no other value than giving men sex. Men like sex. Men want sex. Men will do anything to get sex. Normally they have to because women are frigid, bitchy creatures who would love nothing more than to see you not having sex and not be the one having sex with you. It’s not that the idea of MANswers in inherently terrible, but in practice, one wonders a) why is it important whether or not big boobs float, and b) who would want to know? I think that should start season two: Who wants MANSwers? Because I can’t think of anyone who would. Nice guys finish last, but if these are the idiots in the race, I think the nice guys will catch up anytime now. The DVD contains no special features.